I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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