Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
