i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize