I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
