I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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