so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize
