Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
