I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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