She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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