My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Randomize
