You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
