also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
