Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
