we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
