Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
