what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize
