I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
