I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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