does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
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