Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize
