i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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