If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
