I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
