'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
