my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
