dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Just high enough for therapy.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
