If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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