You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
