I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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