my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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