R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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