Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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