i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
