doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I will pee on everything he values.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
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