I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
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