I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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