i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
