There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Randomize
