I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
