Please don't use social media to get back at me.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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