I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
