idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
