I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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