You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Blood and glitter go together right?
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
