You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
