That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
