Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
