i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
