Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize