You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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